Posted by: undularbore | December 26, 2012

Reg Flags I Ignored, Lesson Learned

Awoke this morning feeling a bit lonely, missing a man’s touch. I decided to get up earlier than usual and start my day. While getting my tea kettle ready I remembered back to recent past Christmases.

Last year: here. 2010 was when joe was dating Christine. 2006 joe and I’s first Xmas together. Ugh, bad memories.
I distinctly remember Xmas of 2006. I was excited about seeing him that night after all our family’s events. My excitement was squelched by his sour stomach. We didn’t do anything. He gave me some Godiva chocolate. And I was home by midnight. Bummer. I clearly remember being disappointed and let down. Then I remembered around that time him telling me he likes to take relationships slow.

After I took my shower and made coffee I checked Facebork. Right there in my feed, friends telling Joe ‘congratulations’. Hummm, so I checked his wall. Yep, he’s engaged to Jennifer. Only 5 months after they started dating! Guess he’s not taking this relationship slow.

So those thoughts got me thinking about all the red flags I ‘saw’ during the beginning of our relationship. DAMN, I should have listened! That is the biggest lesson I learned from dating him. Listen to my gut feelings! If the relationship doesn’t seem right, it’s not. Plain and simple.

——————————————————————

It’s been hours since I posted that .^
I still feel rage. I obviously haven’t gotten over my feelings of how I wasted my time with him. Even though I can find silver linings (like I probably would not be where I am today without him entering my life and I did learn a lot about myself “in a relationship”) I still want to punch him in the face. The shit I put up with caused me to act like a bitch and then the subsequent back and forth between us was just plain stupid. No matter how much I tried to push him away, letting him know he’s not the guy for me, he still kept coming around. And my dumb ass kept rejoining the circus.

Here’s a sampling of what I call bullshit, that I put up with:
He had no driver’s license which meant me picking him up if we were to spend any time together. If he spent the night then I had to bring him home the next day. I would love to have all that gas money back and the time I lost. The kicker was how he made me feel if I didn’t feel like driving or going out for the evening. Good god you licenseless fucker, deal.

He worked 2nd shift, me 1st. Bad combination unless it was the weekend.

I had to put up with his crazy ex who said bad, false things about me in a public forum, would show up at happy hours. I asked him to block her just for the sake of our relationship but he wouldn’t.

Sex was lack luster until our first breakup then he ramped that up a bit. (??)

His temper = horrible. Enough that his mom even dances around it. People who go into rages over the simplest of things = dumb. Shit, it’s aggravating to put up with.

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