Posted by: undularbore | August 3, 2012

The Dream, The Guy, The Gun

Last night I had a very detailed dream. I remember stirring a couple of times during the dream, even had a sip of water and remember feeling one of my cats at the end of my bed, but as soon as I went back to sleep the dream would pick up where it left off…or so it felt like it did.

I wish I would have had the luxury to have recalled this dream earlier today, but alas, it’s Friday and work beckoned.

The beginning of the dream is hazy, but I remember driving around and my mom was with me. The next part I remember is being at a large bar/club. The place wasn’t new to me in my dream, although in reality I’ve never seen the place. There were people there I knew, seemed like there were a few friends. This club had multiple rooms, seems like I remember a room of pool tables, I remember seeing lots of people everywhere. There was even a place to get some food and a place to hang out outside with picnic tables.

I was milling about the rooms, my mom disappeared from the dream at this point, almost like she was somewhere in the club with friends or doing her own thing. In this one particular room, I remember seeing  faces having a good time, some friendly, some friends but there was a guy there I didn’t want to see or hang out with. I can remember his face and his hair and his shirt. He was an old flame or someone I had a ONS with and I didn’t care for him. His hair was salt-n-pepper, kinda outgrown, but only to his shirt collar. If I was to see a person in real life with this face I would recognize him. He had on a polo-type, very similar to work shirts I’ve seen, navy blue with white specs, the collar was navy blue with a lighter blue line or white line near the edge of the collar.

When I saw him, I wanted to get away or hide, but I didn’t because he noticed me and came straight to me. I remember the uncomfortable feeling I had as he approached me, almost a feeling of defeat, because I was caught. He wanted me sexually and “no” was not an answer. The next thing I knew, the room we were in morphed into my old bedroom in Columbia, or similar to it. We had sex, or he had sex with me. I tried to fake enjoying it and looked forward to it being over so I could go and continue with my night (or escape) and try to have some fun. For a moment I felt a bit disgusting, but pulled myself back together and went out to check out the club some more. I need some fun, not stress!

From there I remember running back into the friendly familiar faces and found relief. After awhile the “undesirable” guy left, I asked other people if they had seen him. The answer was no. Whew! I can let loose and not watch my back I thought to myself. Just as I was really enjoying the relief of him being gone and hanging out solo in a chill room I felt him close to me, falling disappointment downed my good feelings and terror started creeping up my spine. The next thing I heard was the click of a gun’s safety and then felt the cold barrel pushing into my left jaw. This event was so real in my dream. The pressure he was using against my jaw hurt, I could even feel the opening of the barrel. Terror soaked my brain.

In my dream I asked myself, why? Why such a drastic move on his part? Then I remembered that I said to my friends that I didn’t like him the way he like me. Basically, he was scorned by me. He liked me more than I did, even though it had been quite some time since we had any contact. The only thing I could do was to talk to him, to talk myself out of this predicament so I could live to see the next day. But by him seeing me at the club and practically forcing me to have sex with him brought back all those feelings he had for me. He couldn’t take it anymore and decided using a gun to scare me was the best thing he could do to try and change my mind. He let me go and at this point it was time for me to leave this place I was at.

I remember going out into the night air, there was an elevated walk over the surface street below. My mom showed up soon after. I told her I was done with the night and it was time to go. But I couldn’t remember where I parked my car. It wasn’t where I thought it was, then I remembered it was down on the surface street but to my left where there was a small conglomeration of vehicles, as it was not the main parking lot. But my car was gone!

A guy who worked for the tow company rode my mom and I to where my car was and didn’t charge me. Then we left! That strange night was over. And so was the dream.

Now I think this dream was in reference to visiting my hometown. Wow! Do I have that much anxiety of visiting that place? I don’t even have plans to visit anytime soon.

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